The Show Has To Go On...

T' was a memory...

I applauded myself...
In the middle of a thousand eyes piercing my soul...
I applauded myself...
I shivered in the fears of passive lights,smearing my face...
I applauded myself...
I rejoiced in the silence and the neatness inside
I was ready to fly with my song...to sore with you along...


I smiled in utter breathlessness
still persuing the applause in quititude
Nisha..held my hand from behind and said,
"This day sing for the person you cared for long.
She is listening from far above...
She waits for you to unfurl the song...
Dont keep her waiting..dont keep her waiting this long.."



I took one last look at the deep blackness
in my soul
I took my song and flew to her...
The person i loved too strong.
I opened my eyes and found...
She was seated, far behind...
She dropped a lil diamond from her empty eyes.
She left...she left may be to never return..
to me or to this worl'


a thousand eyes went down in praise and wonder..
I knew my song was sweet and tender...
She taught me this song,I remember...
Amidst a thousand applauses I was missing her...
I waited for that wet embrace...
I walked back...in the oblivious life..of a performer...
whose Life must go on.....
the song is all that matters....

Confessions I stumbled upon
Its Id today and I was just looking into my phonebook to see if there was anyone I could send good wishes to.There were just two of them.I was taken off a lil by this revelation, not one I was quite comfortable with.Had I somewhere got into unfair stereotypes.Well may be.But did this have to go on?Certainly not.Yes I confess, I had developed Aunty-thinking.Aunty-thinking???_Well, its the way the aunties in my society/colony or for that matter yours think...Sharma Aunty,Singh Aunty,Mishra Aunty or may be Trivedi Aunty.But now, I feel I stand for a time that needs to think and toe different lines that do away with this aunty-thinking.I dont have to know your religion to share my life and its joys wiht you.I dont have to know what family you come from,Sindhi,Catholic,Upper caste Brahmin..blah..blah..blah....What matters to me is YOU.You and Me represent one of the most beautiful animations of Someone(I would like to call it GOD) and there couldnt be anything more illegitimate than this that we are blowing each other up because I pray to someone you dont pray to.Yes, I am a Hindu but that doesnt have to stop me from loving you, my friend.Yes, my Dad is rich, doesnt mean we cannot share roars of laughter and words!Yes, I am Indian, doesnt mean I need to think the difference between us is larger than all that is so ammazingly similar and gracefully beautiful.We are both human beings..isnt that enough?
Well,I am really sorry,i got so carried away, but this time for all good reasons.I wish we all loved each other so much that it pained when we called each other names and shot each other to bleed.
You dont have to GIVE UP ON who you are, But also you dont have to GET HYSTERICAL because they are not who you are or want them to be...Its this simple!

shayad ye sach hai

do hath sane hai khun se
ankhon me dhool hai.
mere bachchon ne jaan gavayi.
hai kahaan, wo jinki yeh bhool hai?
Gumsum moholle me chupi, gumsum yeh hakikat hai..
Aaj jaan se zyada bade,
kisi ke asool hai

World's Best Chef is Rising!

World’s Best chef is rising!
Who did you think I was referring to?Well,if you thought it was me(albeit, those who know me will never get that right)…then Congratulate yourself!I am quite excited about this skill that I m trying to acquire lately.Oh!I am so good at it!Though my mom wouldn’t mind laying down her life against this claim.She is more horrified than happy to see her little girl doing things she has been doing for 3o odd years,so creatively.Who cares if some salt goes missing and some sugar sticks on your tongue,when you dint expect it there really!
I have been making Chappatis(Circular,thin breads made out of fine ground whole wheat) and I am having blast of a time in making these..Literally so.My mom is blowing red…well,I know a woman has infinite patience,but a daughter like me makes her go beyond it…to those levels when she knows there is only God she could trust to make me wiser by half an inch.I have this gross habit of straying away from the central theme,anyways,I have also learnt to make Tea..that has been the most painful experience for me…making tea.It demands every ounce of your attention or you suffer and so do others who misdelegated this responsibility of making tea to your efficient hands.
I am an unconventional cook,who defies all laws that have come to exist in this art of Cooking!(Am I bragging over the bridge?)It really doesn’t matter to me,that it has been just about a week that I have starting frequenting the kitchen side,to help out mom with her cooking,though she complains she has had to work harder ever since altruism got the better of me…also she finds some glasswares missing,she thinks I did it(do you think,I could ever dream of doing such a thing?But I have less idea,if it fell off my hands without my knowledge and just right then I had a call to attend to and my feet shoved them under the carpet…(he he he)
My stint at cooking Dal(a preparation made out of pulses) isn’t less adventurous…I gave everybit of my mortal body to make a good(which connotes eatable-without-making-faces) Dal.HA!it looked perfect after final touchups with garnishing thing.Just so that it looked even more beautiful, I added cashews and raisins on the top(my mom almost fainted just the way you did).My dad was the first to have a go and he had a my-daughter-made-it smile on his face brimming with pride.I gave him a bowl-full of it,so that he neednt ask for more,coz its embarrassing to ask for more sometimes…But…well…umm..things didn’t go exactly my way…my dad Threw up.He didn’t want to,though.It just hit me,I hadn’t added salt,not even a grain of it,but I hadn’t forgotten Mumma’s advise of adding very little of sugar in it,so that it adds to its taste.So it seems I had come up with a new recipe-Sweet-Saltless-Dal.
But I am not going to give up..,with courage,dedication,enthusiasm and hard work…I ll come up with newer recipes like this one(Did I hear you saying…others are gonna need these dispositions as well,in order to live with your cooking?)Well,if you said that,then let me tell you,I also invite you to ascertain my credibilities…

Reality shows and all that!

Reality Shows are raining
Are you as much amazed as I am at the recent downpour of reality shows and talent hunts all over the television?All of a sudden,everywhere you see,you find girls and boys,uncles and aunts,grandmas and grandpas dancing,singing,arguing and sobbing to their hearts content.And here we are on this side of the screen,accompanying them on their journeys to that evasive title,which you will find it difficult to recollect after 6 months have gone by.But somehow I find it extremely difficult to understand as to what remains to be “Real” about these shows.These shows are as soppy as some of the ‘K’ shows,infact they make you sob harder.
Everytime a contestant is chucked out of the show,you have to see the whole drama that ensues.I simply cant stop laughing under my breath,while the stage is being set for the emotional saga to unfold.The contestants cant stop consoling the one who is being thrown out and he cant stop wondering if these are the same people who were after his life a moment ago.To enhance the experience,we have a woeful music running in the background.At this point it almost become unbearable for us and our tear glands give away,and there we go,pouring our hearts out in sympathy,empathy,love and tenderness for the poor participant.But after seeing all that he has gone through and all that he would have had to,just incase he hadn’t lost,all that I feel like saying is-Good for him,that he is out.
Another funny thing about these shows are its judges.They provide for the humour.the nasty mothers-in-law and sisters-in-law of the K-shows find a replacement in the person of these scary judges.They suck the life out of the participants as if they were divinely ordained to do so. Guilt isn’t a word they know.And, if, however, they are on a high, then the participant has had it. He would be mashed under the weight of prolific compliments and comments that seem to go over board. phoney praises that make your head spin.
And even more hilarious is the fact that this is the case with talent shows in stand-up comedy as well. Every channel has one such show that earns the TRPs for them.But like the cliché goes,too many cooks,indeed spoil the broth,Too many stand-up comedians have diluted the humour that it used to be.
And have you realized something,all these heady,hyped up, unnecessarily emoted shows have sneaked into our personal lives, snatching away precious moments that we could have spent with our family doing something worthwhile and creative. We have stopped communicating and far less being in each others company,exclusively.How touchy we have become about our favourite T.V shows,that it has been a long while that we ventured into our neighbour’s house and it has been even longer that we gorged on an icecream with out children while strolling around in a park nearby.
I sadistically hope this trend phases out sooner than later,lest we start losing out on life and living,with these cocky T.V shows eating away on our already cramped up time tables and schedules.

The Making of a Devotee

The Making of a Devotee… :)
I don’t know how and I don’t know when,.when did I start giving up my gigantic egos and began a new journey.A journey in Devotion,a journey in humble Surrender.It wasn’t like this before,surely not.I was one of those never-touch-down kinds,never the one to really call someone my Guru,I was my own Mentor.Me and bowing down in front of a white clad ‘Godman”? was simply unimaginable.(Later I came to know that Godman was the word used by the British to demoralize Indians,they never called their Pope a Godman !Only Indian sages were called so.From then on I have stopped using this word.).Anyways, Though I respected people with knowledge,I wasn’t going to say-You are my God!My Guru!My Saviour! and all that.
However,This guy was so intriguing that almost involuntarily always ,my ways led to Him.I would doubt each step that he would take,wondering what is he upto?Why is he talking like that?Why should he be so caring and why should he be answering my unasked and yet thought about questions?What was he to gain from me? And yet at other times certain other type of questions played on my mind, “Why did he seem so amazingly innocent and why did my eyes start watering just in His presence and why was it that I never needed him to speak,just with his not-of-this-earth Persona spoke a million words of comfort and a deep sense of knowing that He was there for me all along and Selflessly so.
Initially,I would never call him Guruji,I would call him Friend to save my ego.It seemed like I was testing his genuinity and authenticity like a sharp auditor.But everytime he would come out victorious,putting my doubts to grave.I know it would be difficult for some of you to relate to what I am saying,coz long back we stopped trusting people,we stopped trusting Love and Goodness.So had I.But with days and years that passed by,I grew more and more fond of Him and I would become a Child in His presence,innocent,pure and full of inexplicable joy-all this wasnt for the head,it happened from the heart.I would never understand the whys of this and slowly I stopped reasoning my joy,my happiness and stopped reasoning why was I coming back to my nature,coming back home.May be I was lucky enough.True,I do feel so immensely fortunate when I see people stuck in their intellect,they lose out on some Beautiful experiences.
It was like I was this little girl and there was this angelic presence that held her hand and helped her walk through the labyrinths of life,helping her overcome her weaknesses,strengthening her and just being with her when she feels weak,understanding her without her needing to even say and Loving and accepting her for whoever she is,for not just expecting but Believing in Her as She Grows…
He had amazing ways to bring me to realize I was going wrong,definitely one which was Not was to make me feel guilty.Words that earlier seemed too clichéd and dry,found new meaning for me,when he spoke them.He helped me discover,that I had gravely misunderstood my religion and others for that matter,like millions of us…and Oh,If only all of us knew what lay in these Beautiful religions,we wouldn’t have taken so much pride in being irreligious.He took me to the depth of it.Was I turning spiritual?Yes,I was.Initially I was apprehensive about this other side of mine coming to light,but soon I was to realize that if only there was anything,it was to be proud of.I started being proud of the knowledge that was given,I was proud that I meditated,that I was calm,that I did Pranayams and Sudarshan Kriya and if people were to find something to help them come out of their stresses,it could only be this.Why,shouldn’t I be proud of this knowledge which is so Ancient and yet so Aweinspiring?
This journey back from the head to the heart,is the journey we will all have to travel,now or later,whether we want to or not.With head we can chalk out plans to destroy,kill,make money using nonsensical means,but its only with heart that we can reach out to the other being,someone who is not showing it up,but somehow,somewhere needs you,needs your Love and needs your words to lighten up.

A village went MAD-Made a Difference

Whoever said its not possible?
Let me take you down the memory lane,it was just as disturbing as you could imagine…water supply was something that came to them with great coxing and cajoling,may be once a week..all the men in the village knew how good or bad the alcohol tasted just by the face of it,it wasn’t important for them if they knew the alphabets right.Terrified by the state of affairs in this dreamy village of Kapsi,families started fleeing the village and started hounding the nearest towns and cities-solapur,ahmednagar,pune…Diseases?you name it and they had it.The only thing you would wish for after being there is,the slightest opportunity for getting out of that place.There were three things that could happen to you-You run off or you are chased out or you are shot at with n-number of requests from mothers to get their sons certain things called jobs,well it could be anything(atleast that much of it lay in your jurisdiction).

But did I tell you,all this was quite some time back..Today,however its different,its very different..Just as easily you believed its past,its present stands to be as unbelievably and beautifully true.So is the reason I have stuck pictures,real ones at that.Pictures,as it were and as it is today….So that you might somehow like to say-well,this is Amazing!
Would you be interested to know the hows and the whys of this story..
There I go again hitting the same note…The Art of Living…
Its so magically true that any reform or change has to first happen in the mind and then it actualizes into reality.So was the case with my little Kapsi.This village came to be adopted by the Art of Living Foundation and all for good.The instructors mobilized the village residents and made them undergo breathing,Yoga and employability enhancement workshops.Everybody relished the experience of Sudarshan Kriya(which is taught exclusively in the Art of Living workshops)!Well to put it in the words of Vaibhav,a resident of Kapsi, “Sudarshan Kriya was so powerful.In six days,I found something missing in me and that was my temper and I found my self belief.I
was peaceful and could work more.”
Another lady,well in her 60s, told me with an unusual glitter in her eyes, “My feet used to bleed.Nothing helped,but when I did this Art of Living,I was cured.I started smiling a lot.In our village,many babas used to come to teach us about God,but nobody healed our pains.But Art of Living changed my village and my life.Now we have water all the time,we don’t have to go out of our houses for using toilets.We have Chulhas which are smokeless.”As she went on,I could see she was utterly grateful and happy.
Almost at the risk of being called biased,I go on to say,for the first time I realized there is such an organization that has worked magic in the lives of people..You could see this magic in their smiles and in their eyes and in the utter faith they project.
Now coming back to where I was,after all the people had undergone these courses in the village,some of the youths from the village were chosen to spearhead this movement of transformation in the village,they were called Yuvacharyas.(Youth leaders)They were given special month long training that strengthened them into becoming Peace warriors.When I met these Yuvacharyas,I was dumbstruck by the amount of confidence,conviction and yet a sense of calmness,that pervaded their personalities.It was a duality which was new to me,you could be very enthusiastic and you could be as serene in your mind,at the same time.
These Yuvacharyas literally started an awakening in their village,about how they needed to stop expecting and start doing it on their own.They showed them the possibilities and empowered them with logic and love,that Kapsi belonged to them,they belonged to each other.
So to cut an already long story short,in the coming days they would be taking up huge community works and accompalishing them with great ease,Together as one village…Dams were built,as you see in the images,toilets were constructed,smokeless chulhas were installed,Chemical Free Farming(CFF) substituted chemical fertilizers and pesticide,.trees were planted like mad…Agricultural produce increased(look at the size of the cauliflowers) like a bull set free…and how this village got itself a Makeover of sorts..Now when you go there,the only thing you would wish is to stay back for just another day and another day and yet another day-Clean, Green,Happy and selfdependent Kapsi…
I just forgot to say something-Thanks Dr. Pol for giving your self to making this village the Adarsh Gram(Ideal Village)..A Village that we could only have imagined and wished for,if it were not for angels like you and the other yuvacharyas,who awakened a Village to its own Beauty and Splendour in The Masters Grace…
Friends,No matter how badly I might have tried to cut out the grandeur of my experience into right words,I guess I failed.Simply because,Certain things can only be experienced and to that extent less expressed.For those who have been to Kapsi post the changes that have come,would know what I mean and would be frantically nodding,Yes!Yes!she is right.She is right.So I thought let the pictures do a little bit of talking.

My Tryst With The Art of Living....no marketing gimmick...

My posts do tell you,I might be one of those slushy-mushy kind...pathologically emotional...well I am sensitive and not necessarily emo.It hurts to see certain things that shouldnt be the way they are.It may be just that..
But in life,u do bump into some experiences that change the way u thought about it...
Some of you must be thinking-well she is quite building up the plot of her marketing stint...namely the Art of Living..
Well,then tell me,even if that was to be the case...wat harm in standing up for sumthing sensible?U wudnt have had that expression of what-is-she-upto kind,had i spoken to yu about the latest car in the town or my favorite drink?
Lets move into the main story.Why Art of Living and what of me to do with that?
Before I begin,let me tell you,I m not being paid to write this up.no:)
The summers of 2005 and my mom was after my life..she believed in all this world,only an AOL course could change my she-is-killing-herself patterns of life.!I was requested,reprimanded and finally ordered to do the course.(sumtimes they want you to have fun..u dont understand)So I did....
Flashback-
All in all I dint really have a life u wud vouch for-a guileless,enthu-less,stinking,dull,obsessive life that went around all that was sad in this world.I dint believe something like ARt of Living could do ne good to me.Sure it dint,coz it changed my life for ever and I cudnt be that same me nemore. ;)))
It took me those mean 6 days to come out of my darkness and the comfy web of complacence I had built around myself..A bout of Sudarshan Kriya got the crap out of me..the emotional crap.The processes made me get in touch with a finer side in me,that for the first time I realised,There was so much more to me than cribbing and whining.
I made friends for life out there..Moreover,I discovered that really Living had to be an Art.coz it was so beautiful for the first time.This course was a first time for quite a lot of things...
-I discovered,it was interesting and relevant
-.It was simple yet profound.
I was a normal teenager and one thing that I hated was being preached and voila..noone even tried to ...Preach!
-But I was made to think and all my answers led me to a WOW I never thought that!
-The major reason why I loved the course was Complete Acceptance!For the first time strangers ,read the teachers and volunteers,dint have any qualms about me being wierd and troublesome and in the process I Learnt.
Did u ever know,u dont know how to breath,though thats what u ve been doing all ur life?I sure dint,back then..
I entered the course with certain perceptions about the course and The Guru(who is now My Guru),but Art Of Living couldnot live upto my expectations,it went beyond it...:)
For all those who are my kind,restless,crazy,cant-sit-at-one-place kind..This course had that much needed dynamism,masti and fun-frolicking that is needed to realise such an amazing blend could practically be possible,quite alien to our knowledge..
-Sudarshan Kriya was a bomb...oh My God...each cell of my body was breathing a rhythm...
If only people who commit suicides could know what this course is...they wud have realised the insanity of thier thoughts.Nothing much, they missed out on knowing what life is before ending it...
When the course got over,There was a rush of joy in my heart,I can absolutely not explain...What I was more grateful for was,that this wasnt a drug or ale induced high that I was feeling.I had a Smile that had evaded me for 17 years of my life,a smile that was childlike,innocent,pure..
And its this joy I wanted to share with the world that moment!And it came right from my heart,this desire to share this wisdom which is dynamic,simple,fun,uplifting,revealing and Ancient served in a way that makes you feel like you hadnt had enough of it..
Its for this reason I write this blog...To share,coz I have experienced it and I want you to feel it too...I could have with just this ease talked about the latest car,or my fav star or the drink...but it wouldnt have been From The Heart...
Simply put it,if ever u see life is depressing,directionless,go sit for this course..it will open up new dimensions for you...
I wish You Joy,Happiness(this is the change that has come in me) and Grace...
Love
Ruchira

The Warlords will not win....

For my,Ma

For My,MA

People say,words are important,

But I dont understand how,Mumma!

People say,love needs to be expressed,

But I cannot,mumma..

When a drop of tear rolls down your cheek,

I burn deep inside in pain.

But people shall never understand this,mumma!

When you Laugh and Giggle

I have a peaceful smile,

When you are happy and merry,

it makes all the efforts worthwhile.

Did I ever tell you,How much is my love for you?

How should I,Mumma?

I feel so small for all that You have been to me!

I feel so timid for all those painful days

that you have been through for me.

Pain not of a nine months that you suffered...but of a lifetime.

I know I ve hurt you and never bothered to heal a wound.

I know,I troubled and never bothered to whisper-I am sorry...

I could never sit by your side and tell you-

Mumma,I am there for you...

Please believe me,its not because I never loved you,

But because I loved you too much to be able to express,

too much to be able to put it in words,

too much to be able to sound genuine,

too much to be able to have the courage to say-

I AM NOONE WITHOUT YOU,MUMMA!

The Flower in the blue
To bear the pain,to bear the cold.
To bear the autumn in one's fold,
And yet exude the colors of gold,
is indeed the Art to Live,I am told.

She sure is a great teacher of wisdom so profound-
That what you lived by is known,
by what you've left around.
She said this once,when I was blue,
Go find the one more woeful than you,
Pick me up,with all tenderness too
and share me with the one more woeful than you.
As you smile and share your woe,
u'll find the pain dissappeared much long ago.

And oh,I realised what she had left behind...
A more fragrant world,
with happiness inside.
She said this,yes the flower in the Blue...
LIVE A LIFE THAT LIVES LONGER THAN YOU!

The World Inside
There is a world inside you and me
a world far more beautiful,
where things are just as they seem to be.
There everything is natural and real;
the emotions,feelings and tears.
There lies our vulnerability and sensitivity
our ability and capacity.
There nothing is hidden,nothing pretended,
nothing disguised,nothing defended.

But words we speak are not of this world
and may be thats why they hurt.
The love we give is not from this world,
and may be thats why it doesnt last.
But its never too late to start living in this world,
The world Far more beautiful...
The World Inside you and me...

no,please read me out,even if u dont agree initially

Why is it so difficult to belong to everybody?Infact isnt it the easiest thing to do?To Love to belong?Probably not...or else our world would have been a far better place,i tell u.We fear or we care less,or may be we think we dont need to...I dont know...but what is it that makes u and me so cozy in our small apartments and even smaller hearts...completely running out of love...

and one fine day,we get up to realise...we did nothing with our lives...we lived like the creepy things that grow,becoz they have to and die...and fortunately for soome of us this feeling becomes unbearable and then we start moving out of our cocoons to Make a Difference in the world we lived for so long just a nothing...We realise we had it all but we werent happy...
But my experience says...when u make life even a tad better for someone,by doing whatever it is that u can,ur life takes on a new dimension.We might become gr8 doctors,engineers,accountants,celebrities,managers,but what big deal,if U couldnt become a Human being first...if u couldnt "Make out Time" for being,for belonging to someone else,who doesnt have anything to give you except an opporutnity to make a difference to his life?
Has this alone remained the purpose of our lives-to lead shabby,stinking selfish lives,that might have loads of money,fairweather friends,knowledge of how the univrse works or who my target market segment is or how does the heart pump blood?BUT NO LOVE?
Dont tell me,u even know what Love is!
The Love that I talk about is far bigger in its meaning,quite out of what u might think it to be.We all at points of time,feel life has got nothing to offer anymore,life isnt moving and we are not growing,we have become mere bodies rolling in and out of offices and homes,looking after kids..but what after that,what would u do with this stagnation when it comes to bite you...I tell u,feel happy,these are the moments that will bring that change,that transformation that ur life will become much larger than that of others...simply because u will start Belonging to others without a reason and without a motive,except that it will make u feel Good...U would do whatever it takes to reach out to others who might need u...and Believe me, when someone smiles and U R the Cause,U will Feel numb and satisfied....This is how a Complete Life should be...A life where You belong completely...To YOURSELF and to OTHERS...No prayer of yours will remain unanswered...no wish will remain unfulfilled...BELIEVE ME!
I might have sounded a bit rude at places,but may be thats because I feel helpless and concerned,when I see people are tied up in thier lives,they are whining,shouting and feeling strangulated inside and making a show of being happy outside..Or may be because I wish to reach out to such lives..Because I KNOW Our Lives are so Rich..that if we really knew,not one day would go without being Grateful and Happy...Life is so Full,bright and Lively..only we need to realise and be Thankful...
Huh!!!at times I can be really Philo...u see

JAI GURU DEV!
Jai Guru Dev!