I want to go back to that space,when I dint love him,when he meant nothing to my absurd universe. I am sure the process of forgetting is not dubiously difficult. This time its a lonely battle. Infact,it everytime is.After all, we do run out of eternal patience at some point.
All I wanted was a man's love(Though I make a distinction between wanting something and invariably depending on it). But I never knew, if I was ever prepared to have it. Its funny, to sometimes imagine, how stiffling it would otherwise had been, to have had it. But,does it have to stiffle you everytime? Cant it just be a comfort of someone's presence or at best, the company of someone who appreciates you, if nothing and for no reason,just loves you?Someone, you can run to and say-I have a problem with him,with her,with everyone,with this whole world. I have a problem with myself.I am jealous, I am insecure,sometimes. I carry my emotions on my sleeves.I c are for people, more than a lot of other things.I am difficult to be with.I am disillusioned and lost.
But I know my beauty somewhere. I know, I wouldnt linger around for too long. I ll want to break free soon.Would you still like to come close and hold me in your embrace?Would you still want to rest your head on my shoulders?I would want to.
Its not a crutch that I look for. Its just another hand to hold. Who knows its warmth?I want to feel the palm of another guy..want to stare at those lines.
But...the walls must go down. The million strings that bind me, must be broken down.I probably shall, someday...I ll find someone to walk along with. Come to think of it, its just a little lonely,but I have my music and my curiousity for company. How cool is that? :)
No comments:
Post a Comment